Myopia!

As a kid, I had read quite a few books on astronomy. Back then, I could identify most of the constellations and the planets in the sky. It has been quite some time now! Anyway, there are these days when the astronomer in me comes back to life, and I go to my terrace and watch the sky. I sometimes stargaze when stuck in traffic too! It is a nice way to kill some time!

One day, while I was stuck in a traffic jam, I tried to educate a friend a little about astronomy! I should have known better!

Me (pointing to the sky): Dude, look over there, that’s Mars.

He looked at where I was pointing, and then turned towards me and gave me a dirty look!

Me: Dude, what?!

He: You moron, you can not even see what’s written on the traffic sign that is right in front of you, and you mean to say you can see Mars that is so far away?!

I had no choice, but to remain speechless!

PS: I had initially decided not to write about the people I know. But then, there are a few guys who do stuff, that so deserves to be mentioned about! I dedicate this post to my dear friend!

Merry Christmas!

Yippee! Its Christmas already! Man, this year has gone by real quick! I still kind of remember the New Year bash we had like it was yesterday!

I managed to bunk the church service this year around too! Surprisingly, my mum did not abuse me this time! Bummer! I spent most of my time playing on the Play Station at home!

Anyway, I wonder how it would have been if I was in Italy. For sure, I would have got to kiss a lot of Italian girls! Man, I really wish I was in Italy now! And to all my Italian friends, Buon Natale!

Bicycle Diary!

Ever since I returned from Italy, I wanted to purchase a bicycle. What inspired me was the fact that a large number of guys used bikes back there. Even big shots who drove Audis and VolksWagens, would switch to their bikes a few times every week (while it was bright and sunny, of course).

So, I was all charged up when I came back home and told everyone at home about my plan. My mum laughed at me, and thought I was insane. She said that even school kids these days asked for motorbikes and here was I, wanting to buy a bike! Well, she did have a point, but it still did not discourage me. I still wanted to get a bike!

Unfortunately, the rains had to start right about then and it was pointless to pick up a bike. I could not have ridden it anywhere, considering the amazing conditions of the roads during monsoon! I had no option but to wait until the rains stopped. Crap!

Now that the rains finally stopped, I was all excited and started with the groundwork. It was only then I figured out how difficult it was to make a choice! Each store had about twenty or more different bike models, and there were so many damn stores! I thought I would make my life simpler by checking for details over the internet. Big mistake! There were even more bikes listed on the internet! It took me all of last three weeks to circle in on a bike, and the store that sold it!

So yesterday, after a wait of nearly six months, I finally got myself a bike! The only thing left was to ride it home! And hey, have I told you that the store was some sixteen kilometres form home?! Well, I had planned for the long ride and had even changed my exercise routine to concentrate on my thighs and the calf muscles! (Hah, clever me!)

It took me about an hour and ten minutes to get home. Of course, I was a little exhausted, but I did make it home in decent time! I was proud of myself for the fact that I got myself prepared for the ride! I had planned it all! Bravo!

Or, so I had thought!

When I woke up this morning, I realised there was one part of my body that I had completely forgotten about! My bum – it hurts like hell!

What not to do in an interview!

A few weeks back, I was nominated (hurray!) from my office to appear for a long term management program. What it meant was that my office would sponsor my MBA classes - provided I clear the entrance test conducted by the college.

Now people who know me know that I am not so much of a ‘management’ guy. I would rather do something technical, than any of the management crap! Anyway, since I got this opportunity, I thought that it was worth a shot!

So, here I was in Mumbai giving my interview. It started of with me giving a brief introduction about myself, my work and responsibilities and stuff. And then things got a little interesting! I guess the interviewer sensed that I doing a management course would be injustice! I did try my best to convince him that I needed this management degree to lead the industry of tomorrow! And then he asked me this!

He: What do you think your general manager does in his office?

Me: Well, he would be thinking about profit and loss, people utilisation, how much work is currently in ‘work-in-progress’, outstanding, order backlogs, trying to meet the budget, going through various presentations and excel sheets and all the boring stuff!

He: And you want to do that?!

Me: Oh?!

He just smiled, and I knew it was the last nail in my MBA class’ coffin!

I, obviously, flunked the test!

Speaking of Irony

I so wanted to watch the movie ‘The Bourne Ultimatum’ when it released last year, but since I was reading the novel itself at that time, I felt that I should probably finish reading it before I watch the movie. That way, I could enjoy the movie more! Not only that, I had stopped myself from watching ‘The Bourne Identity’ and ‘The Bourne Supremacy’ too. Although these movies released much earlier, I wanted to finish reading the entire series before I watched any of the movies! Okay, I agree I am stupid!

Now that I have finally finished reading all of the three novels, I borrowed the DVD from a friend which contained all the three movies! One hour into the first movie (Identity), I realized that the plot was no where close to the book! These guys forgot to include ‘Carlos’ and they even killed ‘Conklin’! I mean, what the crap?! Carlos is the most important character in the novel after Bourne and without Conklin, Bourne would not have gotten very far!

While watching the second movie (Supremacy), I figured out that I should not try to compare it with the book! These guys killed poor Marie too! In the book, Marie goes on to have two kids with Bourne. The plot in the movie has got absolutely no connection whatsoever with the book! And I am not even going to say anything about the plot of the last movie! Hopeless!

Nevertheless, I did enjoy the movies. They were simply awesome! It’s just that I feel like a complete idiot now, for having waited so long to watch these movies!

PS: You should read the novels – they are much better than the movies!

Skeletons in the closet!

Aha!

Am I spilling the beans here? May be, or may be not! It is just that I spent a lot of time thinking what should be the appropriate title for this post, and ended up with this. And if I have spent all that time thinking, you might as well read all this! It does have something to do with a closet though! I started the post with some intention, but it eventually ended up like this! Initially, I wanted to put in theses lines in the very end as a PS, but now it is right up here! So, here we go!

My wardrobe was in a total mess. It usually is in such a state, but I can somehow get to the stuff that I am looking for, in no time. It is only when I can not find what I want within a couple of minutes, that I plan to clean it up! And today was one such day!

Now, apart from clothes, you will find various other crap in my wardrobe. I keep a few of my books, photo albums, audio cassettes, boxes of mobile phone and jig-saw puzzles, and a lot of other things that are difficult to explain!

Anyway, in the process of rearranging things, I found this scribble pad that I had carried to Italy. Isn’t it nice when you come across some of your old stuff, when you are not even looking for it in the first place?! (Well, in my case, it was not all that old, but it still was nice!) I had initially used the pad for noting down my work stuff, but I had also scribbled many things about the various places that I had visited, and my experiences! Back then, I had planned to write a little something about all those places, and a few funny incidents that had happened and stuff like it. But after returning home, I strangely seemed to have forgotten about it. (May be I could blog about them in the coming days!)

As I started flipping the pages, I came across the notes that I had prepared to conduct a training class on ANSYS (an FEA software) for two of the Italian engineers. Now, when it comes to training or teaching someone something, I am simply pathetic! In fact, I would rather go jail, than get into a teaching profession! I prepared the notes this time for the sole reason that the two engineers, who would be my students, were absolutely gorgeous babes! And here is a thought - just in case my students are going to be that beautiful, then I may give teaching a shot!

Going though the notes, I felt a bit nostalgic, and I wished I was back in Italy!

Flashback to the training session – I tried to look all-professional with all the teaching notes and the practice problems that I had made myself! And once I started with the class, the girls seemed like they were deeply engrossed in my teaching! The only trouble I had was in deciding whether to concentrate on the monitor, the first girl or the second girl! (Actually, I just made up the monitor thing right now, so that this does not look too bad!)

Moving on, at the end of the class, as all trainers do, I asked the girls if they had any questions. They did ask a few questions that had relevance to the class. And then one of them asked me this:

She: Can I change the background colour from black to something else?

Anyone who has worked on ANSYS will know that the background colour is the last thing that gets priority!

Me: Uh?! Yeah, I guess you can. But why would you want to change it?!

She: Black looks so boring!

Me: Yeah okay! Let me see where I can change it!

Well, I was thinking of asking her if she would rather have the background in pink, with bunnies, and teddy bears and flowers and stars and butterflies, and rainbows, and all the girly things that would make it look like a fairyland! But then I figured out that it would be better off if I just shut up! And yeah, I did figure out how to change the background colour and told her that!

And now coming to the effectiveness of my training – one girl never opened ANSYS, and the other (the background colour one!) started using ANSYS WorkBench (An easier and more convenient version of ANSYS). A few weeks later, the client arranged for a professional training for them!

Ironic

I guess I was in my final year of engineering, when I first had this thought of taking up a job, only in an Indian organization. Call it patriotism or stupidity, whichever one you prefer! And when I actually got placed in one such place, I felt like my prayers have been answered! In fact, I had chosen not to attend an interview with a US based MNC that was paying almost twice as much, just because, well, it was not an Indian corporation!

Anyway, after my initial orientation, I was placed in the Construction and Mining unit, wherein a large part of my job involved understanding and studying technology developed by Japanese and used in their machines!

About a year later, I was moved to the Hydraulics unit, wherein my job involved me to design and work on equipments for the mining industry using German made pumps and controls, and French made motors!

In December 2006, I was moved to the Engineering Services group. I now work for clients in the Mining and Earthmoving industry, primarily based in Europe and the United States!

So much for me wanting to work for an Indian company!

Help!

A friend phoned me this morning, and we planned to meet up later in the evening. I, being the punctual guy, reached the destination on time, in spite of riding some twenty kilometres - most of it in incessant rain. And about five minutes later, I get a text message from her, saying that she would be about an hour late. How very thoughtful!

Anyway, she finally arrived about an hour and a half late. For some strange reason I did not abuse her at all!

Crap! This is so unlike me!

And right now, I am just thinking to myself that I had not been so kind, even to my girlfriend! Besides, she had never made me wait for her for this long!

Damn! I need help!

Fund Raiser

According to a friend, this (goatee) is a triangle.

Well, you can obviously see that he needs help, and he needs it quick. After analyzing his comments, I have concluded that his problem could be attributed to one of these.

1. His geometry teacher must have done him gross injustice

2. His eyesight could be compared with that of an aging bat

3. His brain is probably developed just enough to be used to make some Gobi Manchurian

So, coming to the purpose of this post - well, it is to ask you guys to donate some of your dough so that this fruitcake could have his problems fixed. Please be very generous! Also, if you guys could think of any other reason for his display of stupidity, please do let me know!

Stumped!

I was speaking on the phone with a friend today. After a lot of blah, we somehow happened to discuss about how ‘dumb’ my future wife would be! The conversation was like this.

She: I think, you will get a wife who will be like really dumb!

Me: You know, another friend has also told me that.

She: Is he a fortune teller?

Me: No he is not, but he thinks he is one!

She: Even I think you’ll get a dumb wife!

Me: You know what? Since that guy has already scared me with that stuff, I have come up with a way to work around it. I’ll make her take an IQ test, and I’ll marry her only if she gets a decent enough score!

She: Then if she has an IQ higher than yours, wouldn’t that be trouble? She’d be smarter than you!

Me: Oh?! (Honestly, I had not considered that!) Well, in that case, I’ll marry someone who’s IQ is a little lesser than mine! Hah!

She: Yeah?! In case any girl actually agrees to take an IQ test just to marry you, then I am sure she would be dumb anyway!

Me: Huh?! Aargh! (Haven’t I already told you that girls are evil?!)

She was obviously laughing at my helpless situation! And at this perfect moment, my cell phone battery went dead!

Crap!

Why does it always happen to me? The battery is always full when someone I would rather not speak with calls me up, and it is always low when I would want the conversation going on.

Damn you, Murphy!

Now I need to continue this debate with her some other day! Looking at the brighter side, I have some more time to build up my argument!

Blame it on the genes

While I was riding to work this morning, I had this brilliant topic to blog about. And now when I am sitting here to write, I just can not remember what it was! Crap! But now that I want to write, I might as well do it.

So, we had ordered for a wardrobe recently and it was delivered to our place a few days back. There were four guys who had come along with it, to transport and to set it up in place.

While these guys were moving it into the room, they figured out that the wardrobe was about an inch taller than the door height. And nope, it was not possible to carry it in sideways, because, well, my house is built that way. Anyway, after a few attempts by these guys, one of them came up with a brilliant idea that he shared with my dad.

He: (with a smile of accomplishment!) Sir, I think you should call a carpenter and get the doorframe cut, and then we can move the wardrobe inside!

Dad: When you go to pick up shoes and in case it does not fit you, would you cut your feet, or change the shoes?!

I somehow refrained from clapping!

Moustache Tales!

It has been about a week since I shaved my moustache and it is becoming a topic for a silly conversations ever since. Every second person I come across asks me if I am growing a moustache! I mean, are they blind or something?! Anyway, after politely answering to them with a straight “yes” initially, I decided to stop, well, being polite! Here are a few prized ones!

Guy 1: Hey dude! Are you growing a moustache?
Me: No dude, I just stopped shaving it.

Gal 1: Hey Ashwin! Are you growing a moustache?
Me: Not really, it just grows on its own.

Guy 2: Hey, are you growing a moustache?
Me: How does it look like?
Guy 2: You look gay.
Me: And your problem is?
Guy 2: You look GAY!
Me: That’s the idea! And your problem is?

Gal 2: Hey! You are growing a moustache?
Me: Yeah, I thought of giving you some competition, you know!
(She hasn’t spoken to me since I told her that! And I am not complaining!)

And there was this one which almost brought tears to my eyes.

Guy 3: Hey! Are you trying to copy me?!
Me: Huh?! (I was totally out of words!)
PS: He is by no chance, even close to being a celebrity!

And then after all that nonsense, here is one question which I never expected.

Guy 4: Is this the ‘Rock On’ effect?
Me: What the crap? I don’t even know the morons from that movie or even if they have moustaches!

I mean, doesn’t a guy have the freedom of not shaving his moustache without being subjected to stupid questions?!

The first thing that I did when I got back home is shaved my moustache off! And now when these morons would see me next, they would want to know why?!

Singh is Kinng

Hmm! After hibernating for over a month, I am back with two posts in a single day.

Well, I watched Singh is Kinng today. I don’t know what is it with the extra ‘n’ in ‘king’. I guess it must have something to do with numerology, or whatever crap it is.

Anyway, it was a totally crappy, mindless movie! Apparently it was supposed to be a comedy. Yeah, I guess it was funny! In any case I am not complaining this time for two reasons.

1. I wanted to watch a crappy mindless movie.

2. After having watched Om Shanti Om, any movie I watch can not be as crappy as that one. I guess no one can make a crappier movie than this one! (I wouldn’t bet on that, ‘cause I know what we Indians are capable of!)

And coming back to the movie, apart from a few Punjabi abuses, I liked watching Katrina Kaif and Neha Dhupia! Man, they were awesome! I still can not get Katrina with that pink dress out of my head!

A little two much

The jig-saw puzzle that I am currently working on, looks like this.

I guess it would be hard for anyone to believe that this would someday resemble the painting of ‘Virgin of the rocks’ by Leonardo Da Vinci. I had started working on it last December, but was forced to take a three month sabbatical, thanks to my work assignment in Italy. So I had ‘packed’ it off before I left, to keep it away from dust, and more importantly, my dogs!

Anyway, I felt it’s about time that I take off the packing and start working on it again. I started clearing all the stuff that had piled up on it and in the process came across this novel, ‘The Bourne Ultimatum’. Crap! I had started reading it sometime before the movie released last year! It’s been so long, that I now don’t even remember anything from it! Well, I need to start reading it afresh!

So there you go. I stated off thinking about finishing one thing, but now have to finish up two things! And hey, just in case you want to help me finish my jig-saw puzzle, you know where I live!

Unfortunate Evolution

Ever since I returned from Italy, I have been listening to, what I would earlier refer to as, crappy music! I only have to blame Italian television for this change in my music preference. All channels telecast there were in Italian, except CNN. (Sadly, I watch this crappy news channel too these days.) So obviously, I resorted to watching either football, or the music channel called All Music.

Now, All Music, although the name is in English, is an Italian music channel. I had no choice but to listen to all the Italian music. But trust me, a few of these guys are quite good. A few of the artists that I enjoyed listening to are Vasco Rossi and Baustelle. I can’t seem to remember the other names now. In fact, I think I can call myself a fan of Vasco Rossi! And most of these artists came up with very creative music videos, and I did enjoy the music!

Anyway, these guys did play a few English songs occasionally. Most of them though were pop, hip-hop, rap, and similar crap! On lucky days, I could listen to REM or Lenny Kravitz. As a result, I now listen to artists like Leona Lewis, Duffy and One Republic! I hope I get back to my old self soon!

Beware!

I saw this sign at Tarviso train station. I wonder how do they do it!

Damn Firewalls

Surfing the internet at home has become a real pain for me these days. All thanks to my brilliant brother, who has installed enough anti-virus software and firewalls, which would probably put even NASA to shame!

It takes about sixty seconds for me just to open Internet Explorer, after confirming about a million times, that I indeed want to surf! So, if you’re a hacker, or a virus who would want to reside in my computer, I suggest you simply give up! It would be quite a task for someone to take over my computer sitting elsewhere, while I sitting right in front of it can’t get it to do, what I want it to do!

The soothsayer

While I was in Italy, there was this one girl in office, who did all the stupid things that girls normally do! Actually, almost all the girls there did one stupid thing or the other, but this one was far ahead of all of them - combined!

Her seat was not too far off from where I was, and so I did get to see her do most of the circus that she did! She was the biggest source of entertainment in office! And at all the times when she saw me laughing at the things she was doing, she kept telling me: “Ashwin, you will miss me!” I always used to laugh it off, and once even told her that I would probably miss listening to her saying that I would miss her!

Anyway, now I am back in Bangalore, and no longer get to witness any of her tricks. The office here is dull and boring, without her! And now, I am just thinking to myself: damn, I really miss her!

A to Z

I just got this idea of creating my own A to Z list, of the words that have somehow been a part of me so far. It may seem dumb, but then, I have some free time, and an internet connection! So, here it goes!

A

Ashwin. I am Ashwin. I wonder who came up with the idea of giving names to people. He sure was a genius! Imagine how it would be in case we did not have names! Anyhow, Ashwin apparently means a horse rider. Yeah, whatever! In reality, I am not a horse rider. And after riding a horse once, a long time ago, I do not intend to be a horse rider in any case!

Now, my name had been a source of entertainment to most of my friends, when I was in school (It still is for a few nutcases!). They used to call me Ashwini. To be honest, it did irritate me back then. But then, people grow up, and no one calls me by that name anymore. They have just graduated to calling me Ashu!

B

Bangalore. It was a tough decision on whether to put Bangalore in this list, or the swear word that I have been using for a long time now! Anyway, Bangalore has been my home for eighteen years now. In fact, I have spent more time in Bangalore than in my hometown. Although there are many shortcomings in Bangalore, I would rather be here than anyplace else! And yeah, Bangalore is any day, much better than Chennai!

C

Crap. This is probably the one word that I use most. I refer to most people, things, places, and anything else as crap! In reality, it is the one word replacement to all the swear words that I would otherwise use! So you can now guess why I use it so often! It is something that I tried out, so that I could reduce swearing. But obviously, it did not help too much!

Calvin. This guy is my favorite cartoon character. I could probably call him my hero too! I wish I would have a kid like him!

Church. I know this C thing is kind of getting too long, but I so had to put this word here! I visit this place once in about two years!

D

Dog. Now dog, is the name of my pet dog! Yeah, I named him dog! He is more of a monkey, than a dog! He is just about two feet tall, but he can jump up to six feet! He once jumped from my terrace to the next house! I think I should probably sell him off to a circus, and make some money!

Anyway, this guy is unique for the fact that he is the first, and only dog to have bitten me! And I am waiting for an ideal time to return him the favour!

E

Engineering. A miracle! It was four years of absolute fun, adventure, and also terror! All the while I was there, I wished it was over with, but now, I wish it had never got over!

F

Formals. The one set of clothing you will never find in my wardrobe. I just can not wear them!

G

Gube. It means owl, in Kannada. It has been my nick name for quite a while now. Only one of my friend calls me that, and I call her gube too!

Goatee. I sport one, at most times!

H

HyperMesh. It is an F E meshing software. It looks amazing while you watch someone else working on it. But then, it sucks when you have to work on it. Sadly, I work on this software!

I

India. Incredible India! After staying in Italy for all this time, I am even prouder to be an Indian!

J

Jeans. Probably the most amazing invention ever! You do not have to bother about ironing them or washing them! In fact, the dirtier, the better!

K

Kids. You know, I do not really like kids. No, let me put it this way, I hate kids! I find them extremely dumb and annoying. And just in case I have a kid like Calvin, I would put him in the toilet bowl and flush him away!

L

Larsen and Toubro Limited. This is where I work. This was the company that I wanted to get into while I was in engineering. It was a dream come true for me to get in here!

M

Mum. The one person that I can not live without.

Mangalore. My hometown. I last visited this place some eight years ago!

N

Nanda. There definitely is no chance for any other word beginning with an N to be on this list! This guy is probably the devil himself! People who know him, know what I mean! And people who do not know him, are blessed!

O

Orkut. The one website that I have wasted too much time on, and still continue to do it!

P

Pink Floyd. My favourite rock band! These guys rock!

Q

Question Mark. I do have a lot of them. I wonder who could answer them for me!

R

Reunions. A joke! My schoolmates and my engineering classmates have organised quite a few reunions till date. I do not know which one of them all was a bigger flop! Not more than four or five people turn up! But hey, we can all meet up again, for sure, in our next reunion!

S

Swearing. It is as natural as breathing, for me! Yeah, I do swear a lot! Most people assume that I swear because I am pissed off. But it is not my fault that they are morons!

Anyway, I had actually given up swearing for about seven months at one time. I then realised that I had lost about half my vocabulary. It was definitely not worth it, and I started swearing again! I do resolve to stop swearing every now and then, but I know it is asking for a little bit too much!

T

Tulu. My mother tongue is Tulu, but I hardly speak it! In fact, I only speak to my mum in Tulu.

U

Uncle. I used to call everyone uncle at one time. It too a replacement word to some of the swear words, but then it just became a habit! At one time, I even called a girl that! I still do call people that at times!

V

VTU. This was our fantastic, incredible university! The less said, the better!

VCA. He was my HOD in engineering. And with him, nothing said the better! I think even Nanda seems nice, when compared to him!

W

Wilson. Duh! It has been a part of me, all my life!

X

Xerox. I would not have passed in my engineering without it! We used to spend a lot of cash on xerox, even though it cost us only 30 paisa for a sheet! God bless all the people who took down the lecture notes! And God bless the guy who invented kerosene xerox!

Y

Yeti Sports. I have spent a lot of time playing these games at work! In fact, if I had it on my computer right now, I would probably not be writing this!

Z

Zidane. My favourite soccer player! It was very disheartening to watch him leave, the way he did!

So there you go, I have my list ready! Oh crap! I think I spent too much time on this!

Il Mondo Che Vorrei!

No, that is not an Italian swear word! It just translates to the world that I would like! And no, I have no intentions to change the world either! (Actually, I do, but I have a few more important things to do right now!)

Anyway, getting back to the subject, well, it is a song title by this Italian dude, Vasco Rossi. It looks like he is quite a famous guy here. I get to listen to his song, more than once, everyday! (In fact, I have listened to this song so much that I have actually started enjoying it!) Nowadays, I get back to my hotel room, switch on the TV, and hope that I get to watch his song video!

I hope you enjoy the video too!

Snow

I guess most of you guys know about these stupid mind games, in which you are given a set of words and asked to associate one of them to a person you know, and the word you choose apparently says something about how you feel about that person. (I just realized that it was an amazingly long sentence!) I remember having played (or rather, being forced to play) one such game a few years ago.

Obviously, as the game goes, I was given a set of words, and was asked to pick one from it, that I felt would describe that someone. Now, I have forgotten most of the words in that list, but the ones that I still remember are snow and moon. I guess that list even had gas stove as one of the words, but in any case, it is not really important at this time!

After carefully eliminating the words that did not fit (yeah right!), I was left with snow and moon! At this point, it was getting difficult (yeah right, again)! Which of these two words do I choose?! I had to, honestly, give it much thought, because circumstances those days demanded it! Anyway, I wanted to pick snow, but back then, as I had not seen snow, except on TV and in photographs, I chose moon! (Phew!) But now that I have seen snow, I think I am in a better position to reconsider my decision!

When I first arrived here in Italy, I could see the snow capped mountains from my office, and it looked marvelous! So, I checked up with these guys in office about how I could get there, and then took a bus to that place one Saturday. The bus ride itself was awesome! I certainly was excited seeing snow! First thing I did when the bus stopped was jump out and pick up snow! I probably was acting like a kindergarten kid!

I remember having said Wow! Check out all the snow here! It looks great! It undoubtedly was great! After about an hour or so, it started snowing. I felt it was my lucky day! Not only do I get to see snow, but I actually get to see it snowing too! Great! After spending a lot of time taking photographs, and seeing stuff, I was beginning to feel a little cold. In fact, my hands and feet were kind of getting numb! But I was still enjoying the snow! By noon time, the excitement was fading away, and I was like Okay, there is snow around me! So what?! And by late afternoon, I was thinking Oh crap! There is so much snow! And by evening I was screaming What the crap am I doing in between all this snow? Get me the hell out of this place!

Looking at the bus that would take me back to my hotel room arrive, was probably one of the best sights I saw that day! (Not exactly, but at that time, I sure thought it was!) It was a big relief getting into the bus, and away from the snow! The snow looked a lot better from inside the bus!

So, coming back to my decision on whether it has to be moon or snow. Well, I think I am sticking with moon! At least, until I visit the moon!

Amazing Keyboard

You know what? This stupid keyboard that I am using is an Italian one. And like the language, it is confusing too. To begin with, it has more keys than the standard English one. These guys have a few alphabets with dots and what nots hovering over them. And so, they have packed in these extra keys in the keyboard by reducing the size of the enter, and the shift keys. The shift key is about a third of the normal size, and the enter key is even smaller. And every time I want to use these keys, I invariably hit the other keys beside them!

Moreover, the positions of the symbol keys are not in the same locations, as in the English keyboard. The first time I used their keyboard, I could not find the @ key! I had to open my mail, copy the @ from a contact and use it! Anyway, I have now located the @ key! Thankfully, these guys have left the location of the alphabets in their original place! The Germans and the French have an even funnier keyboard. These guys have misplaced the alphabets too! And the Germans even have an under shift key!

Anyway, at work I have a unique problem. The keyboard, of course, is an Italian one, but this brilliant IT guy has installed it as an English one! So, when I hit a key on the keyboard, the character that comes up on the screen is not necessarily the same as the one I asked for!

Confused? Me too!

Understanding Italian

I am referring to the language here, and to any person. Of course, when it comes to people, they are confusing too, but I guess I should not talk about it.

Ciao! It is probably the most commonly used word in Italian. I come down from my hotel room, and the receptionist greets me by saying ciao! And when I leave, she still says ciao! It is the same while you go to any store. The moment you enter, they say ciao, and while you leave, it is ciao again! In office, it feels like a ciao feast! Ciao in the morning, ciao in the coffee break, ciao while you leave for lunch, ciao when you come back from lunch, and ciao when you leave in the evening! Sometimes they say ciao ciao! And on special occasions, they go like ciao ciao caio!

I was a little confused. Now, does ciao mean hi or bye? So, I ask this girl in office (who, by the way, is also my part time Italian teacher) about this. She said its neither hi, nor bye! It actually means hello! Hello? Huh? I asked her why is that people wish someone hello while they leave. Her answer was that it was friendlier that way! Some explanation that!

Buongiorno! This is second in the list, both for its usage, and for confusion! People wish you buongiorno, right from morning till about four in the evening. And after that, its Buona Sera, which means good evening. What happened to afternoon?! Again, I ask this girl, and she replied that its morning till three, and then its afternoon for an hour, followed by evening! (I am not making this up, she actually told me that! Honest!) But how?!

Anyway, now if ciao means hello, you expect people to say ciao while they answer their phones, right? Nahh! They say pronto! And some say pronti! Obviously, I am not asking for any explanations this time!

And hey! Ciao!

Session Concluded!

Well, I had run out of all the cash that I was carrying, and so had to go to the ATM to get some more.

So, I find an ATM and swipe the card at the entrance. Nothing happened! I flip the card, such the magnetic strip is now on the other side, and swipe once more. Again, nothing happened! I looked closely at the faded sticker beside the door. It looked like you had to swipe the card, with the magnetic strip facing you! How dumb! So, I turned the card upside down, and swipe again. Tada! The door opened.

I stepped inside and put the card into the slot in the ATM. (Fortunately, the sticker here was a lot more legible than the one outside!). Now, ATMs in Europe does let you choose your language. I obviously chose English. I entered the code when the screen prompted me to. The next screen asked me to enter the amount of cash that I wished to withdraw, and I entered the amount.

I guess the ATM worked on Microsoft Windows, and probably that was the reason it asked me if I was sure if I wanted to withdraw that much money! Why else would I enter that amount, Einstein?

Anyway, the next screen asked me if I wished to get a transaction receipt, and I hit yes. The screen now read Please Wait. I could hear some buzzing noise, and some printing in the machine (quite typical of an ATM).

The screen now asked me to collect my card, and I did, as I continued to wait for the cash. The noise died down. Silence! I am still waiting for the money! The screen now read Session Concluded! I was like, huh? What? Where the hell is my money? And where the crap is the receipt?

On the brighter side, I at least got my card back!

Drunkard, again!

Guess who called? Yeah, it was that drunk rock fan again! My phone rings, I pick it up, and here is the conversation.

Me: hi da!

No answer. Instead, I hear music! Very familiar music!

Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now, show me how to live

Me: grow up, dude!

He: ha ha ha ha!

Me: I hope you realize this is an international call!

He: I know da! It costs me 16 bucks a minute, it does not matter.

Me: fine, I am not going to hang up!

He: I am going to do this every time I listen to this song!

Me! Sure, dude! Go ahead. And I am going to blog about this too!

And then, he hangs up! I hope he realizes that he is an idiot, at least this time! To begin with, he makes an ISD call to make me listen to a song that I actually enjoy! Second, instead of listening to and enjoying the song, he calls me up!

And I know for sure that he will read this blog, because another idiot, who apparently gets high on coffee, will copy it and mail it to him!

For now, let me play that song again!

One down, two to go!

Yaay! Its already a month since I arrived in Italy. This is the longest that I have stayed away from home. Surprisingly, I do not miss it! Yet! I must say that it has been rather quick. Time sure flies! Here is a list of some interesting stuff that I did/ learnt this month:

Arrived in Italy (duh!)
Figured out that it feels really cold when it is 2 degree Celsius
Figured out that its a bad to be getting drenched in rain when its 2 degree Celsius
Saw and felt snow for the first time
Figured out that it is not the brightest of ideas to go to a mountain while its snowing, and the visibility is almost zero (needless to mention about the temperature!)
Figured out that wearing leather shoes in snow is not good for you, or for the shoes
Figured out that my leather shoes are not as water-proof as the manufacturer had claimed it would be
Went to some twenty-five different churches (the last time I went to a church before this was in October 2006)
Realized that there is GOD (duh, again!)
Visited three castles
Realized that the world would be a lot more populated, if not for the world wars
Kissed Italian girls
Learnt some thirty Italian words
Almost entered a girls loo
Bought an original AC MILAN training jersey
Visited Venice
Hardly swore at anyone (man, I miss that!)

Well, I hope that the next two months here go by as fast as the first one!

Signore, or is it Signori?

I do not know if the subject for this blog should have been this. In fact, I was wondering how to start this, and thought I could put in a few sentences that really has nothing to do with the blog!

Anyway, one thing that I have noticed travelling in Italy is that there are not many public urinals! None, actually! If you want to take a leak, you would probably have to go to a bar, order for a drink, and use the loo, if one is available! But then, since you have the drink, you would want to use the loo again! And the drink costs you a lot too! So that is not exactly a very good solution!

The only place where you can take a leak for free is, in the train stations. But then again, a few stations here do not have a loo! In fact, I had to cut short my visit to Sacile, because I wanted to take a leak! I had to catch a train back to Pordenone to take a leak that day! Can you believe that?! And you would be right if you guessed that not all trains here have loos in them! After this experience, the first thing that I do after getting off the train is, find the loo, and take a leak, if one is available!

Now, I visited a place called Gorizia last Saturday, with my friend. We walked down the platform, searching for the WC board, and thankfully found one. There were two doors, obviously, one for the guys and the other for the girls. The problem however was that there was no picture indicating as to which loo was for the guys, and which one for the girls! There only was a board that read Signore, over one door, and Signori over the other. Well, I assumed that Signore would be for guys, and Signori was for girls, simply because in Hindi, Ladka is a guy and Ladki is a girl! And similarly, in Kannada, Huduga is a guy, and Hudugi is a girl! So, I used the same concept here! If its ending with an i, its for girls! I told my friend about my brilliant calculation, but he was not very convinced! He somehow thought that it was the other way round!

Well, it was a weird situation for the two of us, wondering which door to enter! We were too scared to peep inside either of the doors! Anyway, after a little debate on who was right, we walked up to the Signori door. There was a picture (actually, it was a computer print out) of a man, who kind-of looked like Isaac Newton! Just beside it, was another print of a bald man! I was not too sure if it still meant that it was the guys loo, as there was no such picture on the Signore door. To me, the concept of Ladka-Ladki still seemed right!

In the end, my friend did walk into the loo that read Signori! And thankfully enough, it turned out to be the guys loo! So there you go, I learnt two more Italian words, and it was not even a workday!

I only wonder what would have happened in case my friend thought my concept was right!

Buono Pasqua!

Buono Pasqua! It means ‘Happy Easter’ in Italian! Hard to believe its Easter time already! The office here is closed for four days starting tomorrow. Wow! If I had to be in Bangalore, I would not have got even a single day off!

Well, these guys at work had already started some celebrations earlier this week. The girls had brought some special cake (I have forgotten what its called!) that looked like a bird, and were distributing it in office. And they serve this cake with wine! Yes, they do drink wine in office, and during office hours! Nice place to work? You decide!

Anyway, the best part was not the cake, nor was the wine! It is customary here to wish the girls by kissing them! Twice! And have I mentioned that there are quite a few girls working in this office?! I am just waiting for the next festival here! Until then, Buono Pasqua! Ciao!

Welcome to Italy!

After about three months of speculation, I am finally here in Italy! I’m currently staying in a place called Pordenone (pronounced Por-de-non-ey!), which is about a 100 kilometers to the north of Venice. I read somewhere that the name means ‘Port town of the North’! It’s a nice, small, and a quiet place, with quite a history for itself. A few buildings here date way back to the thirteenth century!

Its just a week since I arrived here, and I have already been to every monument this place has got! In fact, I even visited the next town, Sacile (pronounced Sa-chi-lay!) on Sunday! This town is even smaller! I think Koramangala in Bangalore is bigger and has a larger population!

Anyway, the people here are quite friendly, but very few speak English! It feels like you’re conversing with a kindergarten kid while you’re speaking with the localities with all the hand actions and stuff! And at most times they give you a blank look, probably wondering if you’re sane! Its quite an achievement going to a restaurant and ordering a meal for yourself! And in any case, you’ll be surprised once the meal is placed on your table! I wonder how I will manage in this place for the next three months! You don’t get any English newspaper or a magazine! There’s nothing to watch on TV too that is in English!

At the moment, its quite cold and windy here. You see everyone in their oversized coats, which probably weighs more than a military survival kit! I wonder how these guys walk around wearing them! And at times, it rains too! I haven’t seen the thermometer touch double digits, and am hoping that it does soon! And I am yet to see my shadow here too!

The one thing amusing here is the way people cross the road! Remember what we guys were told as kids about crossing the road? “Look to your right, look to your left, look to your right again, and if there are no vehicles approaching, then cross the road”! Here, its just about the exact opposite! Well, I’m not saying that you have to look to your left first! You don’t have to look at all! You just cross the road whenever you want, and the vehicles will stop for you! And if you’re waiting at a zebra crossing, these guy stop their cars and signal you to go ahead! I hope I don’t get too used to this, or I’ll have serious problems when I get back to India!

Coming to Italian food, I must say, its quite good! Its really tasty, and its definitely a lot better than the meal I once had in an Italian restaurant in Bangalore! The pizzas are so big, that you can actually put a stick at its center and use it as an umbrella! These guys have so many different ways to make their pastas, and spaghettis, and few things that I can not even pronounce!

I am learning a little bit of Italian. Actually its going at about one word a day! And again its only on days when I go to work! It’s a funny language! It sounds like these guys a reciting a poem or something, while they speak!

Well, that’s all for now! I’m planning to visit Venice, Pisa, Rome and Milan once the weather gets better. For the coming weekend, I’ll probably visit the next town called Udine (pronounced Uh-di-ney!). I hope its fun!

WARNING: DO NOT SPRAY NEAR EYES OR FACE OR BROKEN SKIN

I guess most of you guys would have read that stupid warning message printed on a deodorant spray canister which says:

WARNING: DO NOT SPRAY NEAR EYES OR FACE OR BROKEN SKIN

Do not spray near face? Fine, alright. Broken skin? Understandable! But eyes? Huh?! Isn’t it just plain stupid?! I mean, like who on earth would spray deodorant into their eyes. Have you ever heard of or seen anyone who had sprayed deodorant into his eyes? More importantly, have you ever heard of or seen anyone spray deodorant into her eyes?!

No one does things like that, right? Wrong! Well, I’ve seen a guy who has done just that! I saw him in the mirror this morning! Although not very clearly, ‘cause my eye was hurting like hell!

Now don’t get me wrong, its not like my eyes sweat or anything! Its just that I was just shaking the can ‘well’ as instructed, while I accidentally pushed the nozzle down! Voila! I don’t really know how to explain what I felt! I’m damn sure that my tears would have smelt good, but the pain was unbearable! I had a hard time trying to explaining to these guys at work why my left eye was ‘red’!

Anyway, looking back at all the stupid things I have done; I guess this one should effortlessly be ranked, number one!

Drunkard!

There is this guy I know, who drinks a lot. I mean, really a lot! And then he comes up with very innovative ways to irritate me! For instance, he suddenly realises he’s a rock fan! Last night, he was in a pub when he called me up.

He: Dude! Do you know which song is this?!

Me: Yeah, it's ‘Sultans of Swing’ by ‘Dire Straits’

He: How the hell do you know it?!

Me: Because I’m Einstein! Now why did you call?

He: To make you listen to the song!

Me: Uh?! Hang up, dude! I’m busy!

He: You have to come here sometime, dude! Okay, bye!

Well, how thoughtful of him! He calls up so that I can listen to the song they’re playing at the pub! With him, and the other drunkards, screaming on top of their voice!

I just get back to doing whatever I was doing. And he calls again!

Me: Dude?

He: Do you know which song is this?

Me: It's ‘Show Me How To Live’ by ‘Audioslave’ (by the way, it's an awesome song!)

He: Yeah dude! But how do you know it?

Me: Dude, haven’t I told you already?

He: They’re even playing the video! It's like, awesome, dude!

Me: Yeah? Good! I can give you the video when you come to my place next!

He: No, dude! You need to watch it here!

Me: Okay dude, I’ll come with you next time. Now hang up!

Now obviously he was beginning to irritate me a bit. I decided not to answer his calls for the night. He did call a couple of times, and when he realised that I wasn’t going to answer, he sent a text message, which read:

“Dude, do you know which song is this?! Ha ha ha!”

I, was speechless!

The Call!

There are a few people I’ve met in the past, whom I don’t want to meet, in future! I guess it’s a pretty natural thing to do and most people do have their own ‘people to avoid’ list!

Anyway, one way to get pesky people off your back is to not give them your mobile number when you have changed it! But what if they do get your number from a common friend, and call you up?

It can end up being really embarrassing, as it did for me! I was at the office pantry yesterday morning, chatting with friends while I got this call.

Me: Hello?

She: Hello, is this Ashwin?

Me: Yeah.

She: Hi, Ashwin! This is Megan! How are you?

Me: Oh hi, Megan! I’m doing good! How have you been?

She: I’m doing good, too! How have you been? And where are you now?

Me: (Huh? I just answered that, didn’t I?!) Good, good! I’m at work. So what are doing these days?

She: I’m in the eighth semester now. Can I talk to you now, or are you busy?

Me: Hey, I can talk! (I’m in trouble!) Are you in your vacations now, or has college started?

She: College has started, but I don’t have to go to college, as we have to do our projects.

Me: Oh? So where are you doing your project? (How did she get my number?)

She: HAL. (And she went on about the details of her project) And why haven’t you messaged or given me a call?

Me: (Oh crap! What do I say?!) Aah, I had a problem with my phone. Lost all the numbers.

She: Hmm, its been long. (I think she figured out that I wasn’t being honest!)

Me: Yeah, it has. (Its been about a year and four months, actually!)

She: I’ve got placed!

Me: Congrats! Where?

She: Thanks! (And she tells me the two companies she’s got an offer from.) So, how are you? Aah, how’s everyone at home?

Me: (Is she playing a tape, or something?!) Everyone’s good. What about you?

She: Everyone’s fine. So which company do you think I should join?

Me: (Huh? How do I know?) Aah, I don’t really know much about what goes in a software industry, as I’m in a mechanical setup, so, I don’t really know if I can help you out with this.

She: No, just tell, na?

Me: Pick the one, which is closer to your home! (Duh!)

She: Training isn’t going to be in Bangalore, and then I could be posted anywhere.

Me: Oh? Well, who is paying you more?! I mean, is there like a big difference is the pay package? (How difficult could it be?!)

She: Not really, just about two-three thousand. (She tells some more about the offers!)

Me: I can check with a my friends and let you know. But I think both these companies are good, and to start off in either of them is great!

She: Hmm! So, what’s new?

Me: Well, have I told you that I got transferred to a new department last year?

She: No.

Me: I’ve changed my number too! (I thought it was more polite to bring it up this way!)

She: Yeah I know! I called you old number now. Your friend gave me this number.

Me: That’s my dad! (Okay, I agree that I am really stupid!)

She: Oh?

Me: Then, what else? (Yeah, what else?!)

She: Well, I'll call you up sometime. Keep in touch!

Me: Yeah, okay! Bye! (Strange, she’s hanging up!)

She: Bye!

I was a little uncomfortable after the call. I felt I shouldn’t have done this, at least not to her! I think was probably more disappointed with myself, than embarrassed. I was thinking about it once I came back home too. I did send her an apology message before I went to bed, but even now, I still feel bad about it!

(Some names have been changed to protect their identity!)

What a frigging day!

If something can go wrong, it will! But why does it all have to go wrong on the same day?!

Had planned to go early to work today. I wanted to check the results of an analysis run we had started on Saturday evening before we left office. To my bad luck, the alarm clock ran out of battery just about a couple of minutes before the damn thing had to ring! Result – I woke up about half an hour late, than usual! I had no time to get a shave or even to iron my clothes.

After rushing to office (barely making it on time), the first thing I wanted to do is check the analysis. To my rotten luck, all I got to see is an error message saying some crap, and also that the analysis wasn’t completed. Honestly speaking, I was glad that I didn’t come to office early to see this! But I was a little disappointed too.

After debugging the file, with some help from a colleague, we guys started the analysis again. This time I was pretty confident that the analysis would be completed!

I thought I’ll move on to other things, while I got a call from a customer. Whoever said ‘customer is always right’ probably would have apologized if he had met this guy! I once read on the internet that ‘most people are alive because it is illegal to kill!’ I now realized that its so true! To make matters worse, he wanted to have another, longer discussion later in the day!

After lunch, things just got worse. It was quite embarrassing to have a mistake pointed out to us by a dude, with CC’s to everyone he knows! I did feel like a big idiot at this time!

And no, it doesn’t end here! Had another discussion with the customer, which almost brought tears to my eyes! The less said the better! After redoing a few things as asked by him, I thought of checking up on the analysis run we had started earlier in the day. Guess what, that dumb Murphy’s Law was at it again! Aargh!

Some more debugging, and we guys were able to give another run, before we called it a day. Walked back to the parking lot, feeling relieved that the day was finally over! Well, it wasn’t over yet! The rear tire of my bike was punctured! And you know what? It was a ‘screw’ that had caused it! It was a little late to get it fixed right away, I decided to leave the bike back at parking lot. I did have to walk back to office to leave my helmet and jacket. Have I mentioned that its almost a kilometer separating the two?

A friend offered to drop me home (God bless him!) and I did appreciate that a lot! I was too scared to think if it was over until I reached home! To finish off, there was a power-cut while I reached home!

Nothing else went wrong until the time I wrote this. Frankly speaking, I don’t think there is anything else left!

Just January!

What a month its been. Started off in style, with new year celebrations at a friend’s place. It’s kinda hard to believe that it’s gone by so fast.

It was a great month at the work place. No approaching deadlines and no boss breathing down your neck! Was involved in an interesting project, and got to learn new stuff, and thoroughly enjoyed it!

It was a special month on the personal front too. Brother got engaged, and I just booked an apartment! It’s another story that I am now completely broke!

As far as my resolutions for the year go, well - I had resolved to stop swearing, and to keep my temper in control. While I’ve been very successful in the latter, I’ve been swearing out of control! In fact, I even swear at work these days! Hopefully, I’ll keep it in check in the coming months!

A walk in the park

I bunked work today. My friend and I had plans of watching a movie and then just hanging around. We decided to meet at M G Road, and then go ahead and do stuff from there. But a last minute ditch by my friend left me wondering as to what I would do for the rest of the day! The last thing that I wanted to do is watch a movie on my own.

I’d given my bike for service, and so I did not even have my own transport! Having ended up at M G’s, a walk down the road was inevitable! After having walked up and down, left and right, north and south, and of course, east and west, I was clueless on what do next. I was quite tired after all the walking, so I was looking for some place, apart from a café, to rest my rear upon! The closest place that fit into the description I was looking for, was Cubbon Park.

Now, the last time that I remember visiting Cubbon Park is when I was a kid, holding my dad’s hand! And the last time I visited any park was probably three years ago, holding somebody else’s hand!

Just after a minute’s walk into the park, the noise from all the vehicles passing by faded away, giving way to the pleasant sounds of different birds chirping, and leaves rustling! Wow! It was so peaceful! I think coming to the park was one of the wisest decisions that I have made in recent times! It was an amazing feeling looking at all the greenery surrounding you, listening to the chirping of the birds, watching the squirrels nibble at berries, walking under an arch formed by the branches, and on a carpet of dried leaves!

I found a bench to sit on, and thoroughly enjoyed the sights and sounds! It was almost therapeutic. And for those few seconds when the birds were quiet, and the winds died down, the silence was almost frightening. I don’t know for how long did I sit there. I wished I had a book with me to read. I’d have spent the entire day there.

As I was leaving, I remembered having met a guy, while I visited Bombay, a few years ago. While he figured out that I was from Bangalore, he was all-curious about Cubbon Park and Lalbagh. He had said that he would definitely visit these places if he were to come to Bangalore. Back then, I thought he was a little old-fashioned or rather plain stupid for having said that. I had even cracked jokes about him with my friends in Bangalore! And here I was sitting in Cubbon Park myself!

Honestly, I don’t think there is any other place in Bangalore, that can substitute the feel of Cubbon Park. I’m definitely coming back here! And I think you should too!

Two wrongs don’t make a right

Yeah, so finally the Indian cricket team wins a test match! Congrats, to Kumble and his team! Now, can we please cut the crap?

Came back home last night and turned on the TV to find out that all the desi news channels were still running ‘live-special-programs’ some six hours after the match was over! Each one spoke about the ‘heroism’ and ‘great comebacks’ and what-not!

Heroism? As compared to what?

We Indians, are experts in making a mountain out of a molehill. Take for example the ruckus after the Sydney test. We huffed, and we puffed, and we threatened to withdraw from the tour, and we cried foul play and made it a national, or rather, an international issue! Sure, there were a few decisions by the umpires that went against the Indian team in that match, but then nobody’s perfect.

Moreover, it is amazing that no one has any complaints when the umpire’s decisions go in India’s favour, as it did in the Perth test. Mike Hussey and Andrew Symonds were both victims of poor decisions, yesterday. In addition, there were a few more instances in the earlier innings. Well, 71 runs is not really that big deal between these two batsmen. They would probably score that much on the way to the bathroom!

So, why isn’t any of the news channels talking about this? is it okay if the decisions go India’s way? In fact, a newspaper claimed that these decisions “evened out” what happened in the second test! Does that mean, ‘two wrongs make a right’?

I don’t think so!

Like it even matters what I think!

A chicken’s life!

Walked into the office loo this morning and had a shock! Well, it looked like a graveyard! There were dead moths everywhere. And I mean everywhere. Urinal included!

I was like ‘oh crap, what do I do’? Well, I did come here to take a leak, but how could I pee on the moths? I mean, would their souls ‘rest in peace’ if I did so? Or would I be haunted by the ghosts of these moths? And would they pee on me as payback?! That scared me enough to make me take a walk to the other loo. And the scene there wasn’t very different either.

Now there isn’t another loo that I could go to, so I had to pee on the dead moths! I kept thinking about the poor moths! What a life these guys have. This is when another thought passed by.

Just imagine how it is for a chicken, being a chicken. Poor guy must be worried all his life. Its not so much what happens to him while he’s alive he should be worried with. Obviously, he’s gonna be killed and cooked someday, but give it a little thought about what happens with him after he’s killed.

To start with, he’ll be stripped naked off all his feathers. His organs gutted out like it didn’t belong in there. Then he gets cut into many pieces and stuffed into a polythene cover. Finally, he’s deep frozen and shipped out.

So far, he’s had a bad time, but the worst part isn’t started yet. After all that torture, he’s going to be eaten, and finally passed through someone’s stinky rear! So much for his soul resting in peace!

Nice thought?!

Well, I think I can take a leak now!

a hand shake to remember

guess whom did i meet yesterday?

robin uthappa!

i was with a bunch of friends in a cafe and we were about to leave, while one of the guys spotted him and said:

"hey, i think that guy looks like robin uthappa"

after a closer examination, we figured out it was actually robin uthappa! he was sitting in a corner place, facing away from the crowd, probably because he did not want to get recognized.

now, a friend wanted to get an autograph from him, but was too scared, or rather shy, to go and ask for it on her own! so, i just went along with her to give her company! (how silly!)

anyway, we walked up to him, and she asked him for an autograph. i noticed that he looked a lot bigger than what he looks on the televison. (i thought i'd tell him that, but realized it would be quite stupid of me to do so!) so she got the autograph, and he had signed:

GOD BLESS :-)

ROBIN

and just before we're about to leave, i asked him if i could shake hands with him. he at one extended his arm! wow! i wished him "all the best" and walked off!

well, i don't really know if i had spoilt his evening for him. maybe after seeing us take an autograph, more people would have figured out that he was there and trouble him for more autographs! i just hope it wouldn't have happened.

but for me, it definitely is a moment that i'll remember for a long time!

third time lucky?

a lot of people keep asking me about when am i getting married.

and none of them ever really get a straight answer from me.

but today is a different day! so, here’s my reply to all you guys who want to know.

so far, i’ve asked two girls (at separate times of course!) if they would marry me.

the first one said ‘no’ and then went ahead and married someone else!

the second one didn’t answer my question, but then went ahead and married someone else too!

p.s. 'someone else' in the latter line isn’t the same 'someone else' in the former!

and now, i wonder if it's time for me to ask the third one!

nahh! its not time!

everything changes

if you just walked away
what could i really say?
would it matter anyway?
would it change how you feel?

i am the mess you chose
the closet you cannot close,
the devil in you i suppose
'cause the wounds never heal.

but everything changes
if i could turn back the years
if you could learn to forgive me
then i could learn to feel.

sometimes the things i say
in moments of disarray
succumbing to the games we play
to make sure that it's real.

when it's just me and you
who knows what we could do.
if we can just make it through
the toughest part of the day.

stay here together
and we could
conquer the world.
if we could
say that 'forever'
is more than just a word.

if you just walked away
what could I really say?
would it matter anyway?
it wouldn't change how you feel!

----------------------------------------

hmm! yeah, i apperantly thought we'd last 'forever'! at least that is what we'd promised to each other!

but at the end of the day, i still miss you sweetheart!

i still miss you!

i wish you hadn't walked away.

euraka

just realized that i had created this blog page few months ago! man, i suck at this.

i hope to start blogging a little more regularly now!