Keep Walking!

After I read about this guy who rode his bicycle from Manali to Leh, I have been thinking of doing it myself!

It seemed a little too farfetched initially, but then after some serious consideration, I figured I could do it! And now that I have picked up a motorcycle which can take up the abuse of the ride in the mountains, I thought I must make it to the Himalayas on it, rather than on my bicycle! And to have a friend ask me if I want to join him on a ride to the Himalayas - it so made my day!

Anyway, I rode about twenty odd kilometres on my bicycle this evening, and it felt great! So once I got back home, I was wondering if I need to make it to the Himalayas on my bicycle first, instead of the motorbike. Ah, tough decision!

Well, I logged into IM later, and was chatting with a friend. And somehow this topic came up. Here is what followed. (Of course, the stuff is edited to make it easier for you to read, and also the non-essentials are left out!)

Me: I am thinking may be I should cycle to Ladakh!

She: Yes, you told me that.

Me: The earlier plan was to take the motorbike, but now I think I should do it on the bicycle.

Okay, there was a lot of nonsense that was discussed after this, and at the end of the confusion we resumed with the topic.

She: So what are the other ideas?

Me: Well, I think I should do it on the motorbike first, and then perhaps, try it on the bicycle. What do you say?

She: Yes. And then – try walking! Go ahead! Perfect idea!

Right Behind You!

I was reading some stuff a little earlier which, kind of, reminded me about my college days. We had this lecturer guy, who taught us some stuff. No wait – he actually did not teach us any stuff! Bugger! (Let me call him as Bugger in this post, just to protect his identity!) He always used to come late to class, make us debate on things that were not a part of our syllabus, and leave the class even before it was time to leave! But you know what? All of us loved him for that!

Anyway, this one day I was headed to class with a friend, and we were running a little late. We got to the elevator, and as usual, there were quite a few people waiting for it. And here is the conversation that followed between us.

Me: Oh crap, we are late!

He: Yeah, we are.

Me: Who is supposed to be taking class for us now?

He: Bugger.

Me: Oh crap! It is going to be horrible!

We somehow managed to get into the elevator when it arrived – although there were far more people ahead of us, than the elevator would hold! (Indian instincts, you see!) Few others got in, and we got going.

Me: Hey, how about we push this carpet into the door, so that the door does not close?!

At this stage, my friend suddenly stopped responding to me, and started acting a little funny!

He: Shh!

Me: What the crap is wrong with you?

He did not answer anything, but instead, it looked like he was trying very hard to step on my feet! On asking him again, he wanted to get away from me! Also, he was moving around his eyes too! All in all, it looked like he was in the middle of a Bharatanatyam step! I have no idea what happened to him all of a sudden. I mean – even I was breathing the same air, you know!

Anyhow, we got to the floor we had to get off, and so stepped out of the elevator.

Me: I bet you a hundred bucks – Bugger would still not have come to class!

He: Yeah you are right – he is not in class!

Me: And how are you so sure?!

He: He took the lift along with us, and now – he is right behind you!

Outsourced

A few days ago in office, a bunch of us were trying to figure out as to why would someone operating in Brazil would want to outsource his work to us in India. When you look at it, the cost of labour in Brazil is not all that high. So why would they still want to outsource?

It was while thinking about this, I was reminded about an incident where I met a Brazilian couple.

A friend and I had been to Verona a long time ago. We were to meet another friend there, before we could go about roaming around the city. As planned, we met him at the train station at Verona, and we guys proceeded to the tourist information office at that place. The lady at the counter gave us an itinerary – and we were to start off by visiting the arena. Now this lady asked us to board bus number 33, which would arrive at platform ‘A’, right outside the train station.

We guys promptly went to platform ‘A’, as instructed. After a few minutes of waiting, we spotted a bus numbered 33 arrive – only, instead of stopping at platform ‘A’, it stopped at platform ‘C’!

We were like, “what the crap?!”

We were certain that the lady said platform ‘A’. Then why did bus stop at platform ‘C’?

We had no time to think for answers! In under a second the three of us were running across platforms to get into that god-dammed bus number 33! (After all, we are Indians, you see!) Looking at us run, a few other tourists followed us. (And nope, they were not Indians!) Anyhow, we got into the bus and it got going.

After cursing that lady at the counter, we enquired about how much time it would take us to get to the arena. Thanks to all the Italians and their inability to understand English, it took us a good fifteen minutes to figure that the bus was not even headed to the arena! Not just that, the bus was headed to a place in the exact opposite direction to arena!

More curses!

It was at this time that a couple who followed us into the bus realised that they were screwed too! They too were headed to the arena, and were asked to wait at platform ‘A’, but they thought that following us would get them to their destination quicker! Anyway, for the moment, we had to find out a way to get out of this mess! We tried to speak with the bus driver, but unfortunately for us, he spoke little English!

Looking at our predicament, a lady in the bus offered to help us out. She explained to us that the bus made two separate loops, intersecting at the train station. We were to get take the bus at platform ‘A’ to go the arena, and from platform ‘C’ to go to some other place. We smart guys – took it from ‘C’!

So it meant that we just stayed in the bus, it would still get to the arena; but after going to this some place, and then coming back to the train station – at platform ‘A’! Looking at the brighter side, at least we get to see this ‘some other’ place before the arena!

Some more curses!

Now that we knew we would get to the arena in a while, we started a conversation with this couple. They were from Brazil, and had come to Italy on a vacation. Once they got to know that we guys were from India, they were all excited. They spoke about how India is doing good at outsourcing, computers, satellites and stuff! Their overall impression was that Indians are a smart bunch – and we guys did not let them figure out the truth!

Anyway, after all the drama, we were finally arrived at the arena and the bus driver signalled for us to get off. So it was time to bid adieu to our Brazilian friends and carry on!

Strangely, they did not get off the bus with us! They just stood there inside, waving us goodbye! We guys did tell them that they had to get down here, in case they wanted to go to the arena, but they just stood there – waving goodbye! And the funny thing is – they indeed wanted to go to the arena!

The bus driver got so annoyed at them, that he actually got off his seat, walked up to them, and almost pushed them out of the bus!

So there you go - you now know the reason why these Brazilian guys are outsourcing their work to us!

Office Bits

I have always believed that it is best to leave all your work related stuff back in office, while you leave for home. And for that sole reason, lately, I have not been leaving for home!

Ah, the last three weeks have been absolutely dreadful! I have been putting in a minimum of twelve hours of work a day. And in between all this, I also spent a night out in office, and worked on a Sunday too! Damn, when do I retire?!

Anyway, so with all this time spent in office, my life seems to be revolving only around work. And surprisingly, there are quite a lot of things that are turning up pretty nicely here - and I would like to say a lot about it! But unfortunately, the ‘Non Disclosure Agreement’ that I have signed with the office prevents me from blurting it out! Actually speaking, whatever I want to say is either too personal; too boring; or too gross!

But yeah, here is something that is worth sharing. I was at my seat working on my stuff, and a friend was beside me, helping me out. A colleague walked by, and we noticed that he had shaved his head. I guess we all know why most Indian men shave their heads. So my friend asked him this:

Friend: Did you go to Tirupati?

He: No, I went to barber shop!

Yeah, that is about all I want to say!

PS: I am sure most of you guys are cursing me for this post! This is what happens when you spend more than the required amount of time in office. You look for amusement in weird things!

Let me go catch some sleep!