Lucky me!

Have I ever mentioned to you guys that I hate kids?! Probably more than a million times already!

The one thing that irritates me the most about them is their never ending crying. Actually speaking, I think it is probably the only reason why I hate them so much! Ah, not really, there are definitely other reasons too, but never mind! Anyway, crying is one thing, but what these guys do could be classified as howling! I sometimes wonder as to how could such a small object (read kid) with such a small opening (read mouth) produce such loud sounds, and for such long durations! It is kind of like these jet engines which produce more thrust than the entire weight of the aircraft – totally disproportionate!

To my rotten luck, there always is a kid no matter where I go! Say I am in a restaurant enjoying the food, and having a nice time; and then in some stupid corner a kid starts crying! And that is about all the food you can enjoy. But at least when it comes to a restaurant, you do not really spend too much time there.

So now, let us talk about travelling! Honestly, I do not remember when was the last time I went anywhere without a kid accompanying me! Imagine having to listen to an idiot cry all the way from Italy to India! It has to hurt, right? And now, imagine two of such idiots! It is absolute torture!

Anyway, so this one time I got into a bus and I was very surprised to find that there was not a single kid in it! Can you believe it? Not a single one! Hah! Oh, you have no idea how happy that made me feel! Just thinking about it even now makes me want to smile! So, I got into my seat thinking that my luck is beginning to change and stuff!

Ah, come on now, it is quite obvious that this does not have a happy ending! If it had one, then I would probably not have written about it! Anyway, so these guys start playing a movie, and guess what? The movie was ‘Hey Baby’! Now if anyone of you has not watched it yet, then consider yourself very lucky! God, that dumb movie has got a freaking kid crying for like - ever! The guy who wrote the dialogues for the movie must have had an extremely simple job. Every alternate dialogue would have been:

Baby: cry!

Okay, now did I tell you that there was a freaking speaker right over my head?! So much for me feeling lucky!